the day i saved my own life
it started out with feet. not shoes. feet. just feet. that’s all. i was walking up a steep hill, saw the feet lying there on the sidewalk, and noticed a body attached to them too. the body was lying on its stomach. the head was facing straight down, causing the nose to squash against the pavement. i then noticed an empty pair of shoes just above the head. they were set neatly side by side, as if put there on purpose, as if some thought had been put into the matter beforehand. They were just shoes, but they probably belonged to somebody, and that somebody had most likely put them there. For what reason? I hadn’t the foggiest notion. the feet were there. the sun was hot. the feet probably didn’t smell good. the body wasn’t moving. i kept walking up the hill, past the feet, past the body, and then past the shoes. it felt good to be moving. soon i forgot about the feet. they were just feet. nothing to be too concerned with. while waiting for the light to change at the intersection i stuck my hand out to swat down a pigeon that was flying a bit too close to me. i hit it a good one. knocked it down with a chopping blow that sent it flailing, instead of flying, across the street. i watched it struggle in midair, as if trying to dance while trapped inside a running blender set to puree. the pigeon kind of made a last heaving motion with its body, then it went down hard onto the sidewalk. i felt good about what i’d done. i marveled at it. i did a lot of marveling in those days. there were many things worthy of being marveled at. this was just another thing. so i went about marveling, watching that damn pigeon squirm around there, futilely flapping its grimy wings in misery. i was chewing gum at the time. i took it out of my mouth, held it in my hand a moment, and then threw it at the traffic signal. it missed. then the light changed. i crossed the street and forgot about the pigeon.
